Out From Under The Rock

Wow. It's been a while since I've been here. Sorry about that. It's just that I've been a little busy. Yup, that's right. I've been.....writing! Actual, every day, disciplined writing. Between 1,000 and 2,000 words every day. Except Sunday. Which means the novel is moving along quite nicely. I'm about two thirds finished. I can't believe it! I'm on the homestretch! Well, for the writing part. Then comes editing, revising....but I'll think about that some other time. Right now I am focused on getting it all on paper (or screen).

I'm learning a lot too. About myself, and what I can do when I put my mind to it. Sounds like a cliche, I know. But if you had asked me a year ago if I would ever write a book, I would have said 'maybe....dunno....sounds neat tho.' And that would be fear talking. Because fear, my friends, is a big scary monster that keeps me from acting on my dreams. It keeps me inert, frozen in a glacier full of what-ifs and I-cants. And every day that I act in opposition to my fears, and turn the volume down on the scary unknown, the fear gets less and less. And I realize that fear is not real. It feels real, when I allow it to take precedence in my thoughts. But it isn't. It's simply a feeling. And I can override that feeling by action. And that brings confidence.

So, I can honestly say that I am feeling more confident as a writer. A lot of my doubts have fallen away with every letter I hit on my keyboard. Not that I don't still struggle, because I do. Especially when I read about how tough it is to find an agent, or the reality of the publishing industry right now. But the more I simply do, and write, the more I believe in myself. And that feels good.

I'll try and write more regularly on here, and keep you up to date on the adventures of an emerging writer.

Time to go back under the rock.

Discipline. Whoopee.

I haven't had much to say here lately. Truth is, the reality of writing a book is much different than the idea of it. No surprise there, you say? Probably true. However, now that I am definitely on my way (48 pages, yahoo!!) I am realizing that the nuts and bolts of the thing is way bigger than I thought. Writing is a discipline. It doesn't matter if I feel inspired, or creative, or even remotely into it, I write because this is now my job. My gracious husband is giving me a year (or rather, that's what I said I need and he said 'okay') to get this book written, revised and ready for its future life (whether that's publication or the circular file) and so I am taking it seriously and writing every day. Except on the weekends when life with the family takes priority, but even then I spend a little time each day either re-reading or researching or reading one of my many 'how to be a writer' books.

Which brings me to another point. This is a mental game to be sure. I read a book by Sol Stein, a brilliant author and editor. He had some great stuff in there that is really going to help me in my journey. However, after I read it and I sat down to write, all that information came barreling through my brain and I found myself trying to edit as I wrote. Is that dialogue true? Are the characters interesting enough? What point of view for this scene? And whammo!!! My mojo was gone. For days I moped around singing the blues. I can't do this! Who do I think I am! All the familiar demons made an appearance and I listened.

Then I sat with a friend and talked and she gave me a smack and got me back on track.

Thanks, friend. I needed that.

So, my point is that I am learning about the discipline of writing as a job. And, just like any job, it has it's good days and bad days, lessons have to be learned and stuff has to be done that I don't want to do.

So maybe my next post will be about something fun, instead of writing about writing.

Maybe I'll write about the awesome turkey soup I made yesterday, or the gorgeous leaves of fall I found on a walk.

Stay tuned.